He came over in long purposeful strides, sat at the edge of her bed, and in a tender, possessive gesture wiped the lipstick off her lips. “What is that?” he asked.
“All the other girls wear it,” Tatiana said, quickly wiping her mouth, breathless at the sight of him. “Including Dasha.”
“Well, I don’t want you to have anything on your lovely face,” he said, stroking her cheeks. “God knows, you don’t need it.
I want you to know that should something happen to me, don’t worry about my body. My soul isn’t going to return to it, nor to God. It’s flying straight to you, where it knows it can find you, in Lazarevo. I want to be neither with kings nor heroes, but with the queen of Lake Ilmen.
Paullina SimonsWhen you die, you’ll be wearing your white dress with red roses, and your hair will be long and falling around your shoulders. When they shoot you, up on your damn roof or walking alone on the street, your blood will look like another red rose on your dress, and no one will notice, not even you when you bleed out for Mother Russia.
Paullina SimonsI want to meet this one,” he said. “I need to meet the girl who has taken our wandering Alexander’s horse and cart.
Paullina SimonsCourage, Alexander,” she whispered.
“Courage, Tatiana.
I give you," said Alexander, glancing at her, "what you need most from me.
Paullina SimonsSome words were like that. Whole lives attached to them. Ghosts and lives and ecstasy and sorrow.
Paullina SimonsYou will find a way to live without me. You will find a way to live for both of us, Alexander had said to her, once.
She knew now, knew for certain what she had long feared, long suspected: Alexander had handed her his life and said, this is for you. I cannot save myself, I can only save you, and you have to go and live your life the way you and only you were meant to live it. You have to be strong, and you have to be happy, and you have to love our child, and eventually, you have to love. Eventually, you have to learn to love again, and to smile again, and to put me away, you have to learn to hold another man's hand, and kiss another man's lips. You have to marry again. You have to have more children. You have to live your life--for me, for you. You have to live it as we would have lived it. All in one word: Orbeli.
Tatiana...you and I had only one moment..." said Alexander. "A single moment in time, in your time and mine...one instant, when another life could have still been possible." He kissed her lips. "Do you know what I'm talking about?"
When Tatiana looked up from her ice cream, she saw a soldier staring at her from across the street.
"I know that moment," whispered Tatiana.
Oh Alexander," she said, "what do you want from me..."
"Everything!" he whispered fiercely.
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