It was as good a dinner as I have ever absorbed, and Thomas like a watered flower. As we sat down he was saying some things about the Government which they wouldn't have cared to hear. With the consomme pate d'Italie he said but what could you expect nowadays? With the paupiettes de sole a la princesse he admitted rather decently that the Government couldn't be held responsible for the rotten weather, anyway. And shortly after the caneton Aylesbury a la broche he was practically giving the lads the benefit of his whole-hearted support.
P.G. WodehouseOh, Jeeves," I said, "did Peabody and Simms send those soft silk shirts?"
"Yes, sir. I sent them back."
"Sent them back!"
"Yes, sir."
I eyed him for a moment. But I mean to say. I mean, what's the use?
"Oh, all right," I said. "Then lay out one of the gents' stiff-bosomed."
"Very good, sir," said Jeeves.
Well, everybody seems to be doing it," I said, "so I suppose I had better make the thing unanimous. Here's a fiver."
"Why, thank you, sir. This is extremely - "
"It won't seem much compared with these vast sums you've been acquiring."
"Oh, I assure you, sir."
"And I don't know why I'm giving it to you."
"No, sir."
"Still, there it is."
"Thank you very much, sir.
But I say, really, you know, I am an old friend of the family. Why, by Jove, now I remember, there's a photograph of me in the drawing-room. Well, I mean, that shows you!"
"If there is," said the policeman.
"I've never seen it," said the parlourmaid.
I absolutely hated this girl.
"You would have seen it if you had done your dusting more conscientiously," I said severely. And I meant it to sting, by Jove!
"It is not a parlourmaid's place to dust the drawing-room," she sniffed haughtily.
"No," I said bitterly. "It seems to be a parlourmaid's place to lurk about and hang about and - er - waste her time fooling about in the garden with policemen who ought to be busy about their duties elsewhere."
"It's a parlourmaid's place to open the front door to visitors. Them that don't come in through windows."
I perceived that I was getting the loser's end of the thing.
I mean, if you're asking a fellow to come out of a room so that you can dismember him with a carving knife, it's absurd to tack a 'sir' on to every sentence. The two things don't go together.
P.G. WodehouseTags: humour p-g-wodehouse thank-you-jeeves
Well, all right. Something in what you say, I suppose. Consider you treacherous worm and contemptible, spineless cowardly custard, but have booked Spink-Bottle. Stay where you are, then, and I hope you get run over by an omnibus. Love. Travers
P.G. WodehouseHypatia, like all girls who intend to be good wives, made it a practice to look on any suggestions thrown out by her future lord and master as fatuous and futile.
P.G. WodehouseTags: gala-night
Once in every few publishing seasons there is an Event. For no apparent reason, the great heart of the Public gives a startled jump, and the public's great purse is emptied to secure copies of some novel which has stolen into the world without advance advertising and whose only claim to recognition is that The Licensed Victuallers' Gazette has stated in a two-line review that it is 'readable'.
P.G. WodehouseTags: publishing
Mr. Roddis: [Outraged at the presence of two apparent burglars (actually his in-laws) having tea in his suburban home] - And they've opened a pot of my raspberry jam."
Uncle Fred: [Architect of the above missunderstanding] Ah, then you will be able to catch them red-handed. I should fetch a policman.
Tell me," said Ashe gratefully, leaning forward in an attitude of attention, "all about the lining of your stomach.
P.G. Wodehouse« first previous
Page 51 of 54.
next last »
Data privacy
Imprint
Contact
Diese Website verwendet Cookies, um Ihnen die bestmögliche Funktionalität bieten zu können.