Believe me, I know people who have doting Grandmas. Jessica's Grandma Pearl spent four years knitting her a blanket. Four years! And she's got arthritis. I wonder what Grandma Pearl would think if she knew Jessica lost her virginity to Michael Greenberg under the blanket she spent four years knitting with her crooked fingers.
Simone ElkelesTags: amy
If I had any choice in the matter, I'd stay in my comfy bed and eat warm chocolate chip cookies all day.
Simone ElkelesThis is a team of gay dudes, isn't it?"
What gave it away? The pink shirts, or half our team drooling over you?
Tags: humour lgbt homosexuals
Please, amigo. We need you, Kimosabe, O Mighty Powerful One. We need you more than the earth rises in the west."
The sun rises in the east, dickhead."
Only if you're standing on the earth. If you're on the moon, the earth rises in the west.
Tags: humour
You’re dangerous,” he says.
“Why?”
“Because you make me believe in the impossible
Tags: romance
Consider me your candy stripper... I mean striper.
Simone ElkelesTags: humour
Expectations make people miserable, so whatever yours are, lower them. You'll definitely be happier.
Simone ElkelesTags: wisdom truth happiness noah
We're in the Chicago suburbs, ruling our 'hood and the streets that lead here. It's a street war, where other
suburban gangs fight us for territory. Three blocks away are mansions and million-dollar houses. Right here,
in the real world, the street war rages on. The people in the million-dollar houses don't even realize a battle is
about to begin less than a half mile from their backyards.
Don't they give you happy pills in this
place?
I've had more students die than I ever thought possible. My husband urges
me to quit Fairfield and teach at some school without gang members who live their lives only to die or end up
as drug dealers.
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