Cheat? Good heavens, this is an amateur cricket match amongst leading prep schools, I'm an Englishman and a schoolmaster supposedly setting an example to his young charges. We are playing the most artistic and beautiful game ever devised. Of course I'll cunting well cheat. Now, give me my robe and put on my crown. I have immortal longings in me.

Stephen Fry

Tags: humour



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Life, that can shower you with so much slendour, is unremittingly cruel to those who have given up.

Stephen Fry


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Life, that can shower you with so much splendour, is unremittingly cruel to those who have given up.

Stephen Fry


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I'm fat because I'm greedy, and if my mind is fat it's because I'm curious.

Stephen Fry

Tags: knowledge curiosity greed



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Music is everything and nothing. It is useless and no limit can be set on its use. Music takes me to places of illimitable sensual and insensate joy, accessing points of ecstasy that no angelic lover could ever locate, or plunging me into gibbering weeping hells of pain that no torturer could devise. Music makes me write this sort of maundering adolescent nonsense without embarrassment. Music is in fact the dog's bollocks. Nothing else comes close.

Stephen Fry

Tags: music



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I was born Mary Patterson, but then I married and naturally took my husband's name, so now I'm Neil Patterson.

Stephen Fry


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Not one word of the following is true

Stephen Fry


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It is a cliché that most clichés are true, but then like most clichés, that cliché is untrue

Stephen Fry


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The worst of this sorry bunch of semi-educated losers are those who seem to glory in being irritated by nouns becoming verbs. How dense and deaf to language development do you have to be? If you don’t like nouns becoming verbs, then for heaven’s sake avoid Shakespeare who made a doing-word out of a thing-word every chance he got. He TABLED the motion and CHAIRED the meeting in which nouns were made verbs

Stephen Fry

Tags: english-language



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I am aware of the technical distinction between ‘less’ and ‘fewer’, and between ‘uninterested’ and ‘disinterested’ and ‘infer’ and ‘imply’, but none of these are of importance to me. ‘None of these are of importance,’ I wrote there, you’ll notice – the old pedantic me would have insisted on “none of them is of importance”. Well I’m glad to say I’ve outgrown that silly approach to language

Stephen Fry


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