My most persistent memory of stand - up is of my mouth being in the present and my mind being in the future: the mouth speaking the line, the body delivering the gesture, while the mind looks back, observing, analyzing, judging, worrying, and then deciding when and what to say next. Enjoyment while performing was rare - enjoyment would have been an indulgent loss of focus that comedy cannot afford.
Steve MartinShe tried to get even with him through psychological warfare but couldn't, because he didn't care.
Steve MartinWere they beautiful? We were all beautiful. We were in our twenties.
Steve MartinIt's so hard to believe in anything anymore. I mean, it's like, religion, you really can't take it seriously, because it seems so mythological, it seems so arbitrary...but, on the other hand, science is just pure empiricism, and by virtue of its method, it excludes metaphysics. I guess I wouldn't believe in anything anymore if it weren't for my lucky astrology mood watch.
Steve MartinI believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you set out to make art you're an idiot.
Steve MartinA celebrity is any well-known TV or movie star who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair.
Steve MartinTags: celebrity
You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
Steve MartinTags: humor sex cluelessness
LOVE IN THE TIME OF CHOLERA: WHY IT'S A BAD TITLE
I admit that "Love in the time of . . ." is a great title, up to a point. You're reading along, you're happy, it's about love. I like the way the word time comes in - a nice, nice feeling. Then the morbid Cholera appears. I was happy till then. Why not "Love in the Time of the Blue, Blue, Bluebirds"? "Love in the Time of Oozing Sores and Pustules" is probably an earlier title the author used as he was writing in a rat-infested tree house on an old Smith Corona. This writer, whoever he is, could have used a couple of weeks in Pacific Daylight Time.
The banjo is such a happy instrument--you can't play a sad song on the banjo - it always comes out so cheerful.
Steve MartinIf you've got a dollar and you spend 29 cents on a loaf of bread, you've got 71 cents left; But if you've got seventeen grand and you spend 29 cents on a loaf of bread, you've still got seventeen grand. There's a math lesson for you.
Steve MartinTags: wealth insignificance
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