The Doctor: Don't blink. Don't even blink. Blink and you're dead. Don't turn your back. Don't look away. And don't blink.
Steven MoffatTags: doctor-who blink
River Song: Use the stabilisers!
The Doctor: It doesn't have stabilisers!
River Song: The blue switches!
The Doctor: The blue ones don't do anything, they're just... blue!
River Song: Yes they're blue: they're the blue stabilisers! [presses the button and the TARDIS indeed stabilises] See?
The Doctor: Yeah? Well, it's boring now, isn't it? They're boring-ers! They're blue... boring-ers!
Amy: Doctor, how come she can fly the TARDIS?
The Doctor: You call that flying the TARDIS? [scoffs] Ha!
River Song: Okay, I've mapped the probability vectors, done a foldback on the temporal isometry, charted the ship to its destination and... [presses a button, the cloister bell clangs] parked us right alongside.
The Doctor: Parked us? But we haven't landed!
River Song: Of course we've landed; I just landed her.
The Doctor: But it didn't make the noise.
River Song: What noise?
The Doctor: You know, the... [does an impression of the TARDIS materialisation sound]
River Song: It's not supposed to make that noise. You leave the brakes on.
The Doctor: Yes, well, it's a brilliant noise. I love that noise.
Tags: doctor-who amy-pond tardis river-song
The Doctor: Just had a fall. All the way down there, right to the library. Heck of a climb back up.
Amelia: You're soaking wet.
The Doctor: I was in the swimming pool.
Amelia: You said you were in the library.
The Doctor: So was the swimming pool.
Tags: doctor-who
The Doctor: You know how adults tell you everything's going to be fine, just to make you feel better?
Amelia: Yes.
Doctor: Well.....everything's going to be fine.
Tags: doctor-who the-eleventh-hour
Come on, Rory! It isn't rocket science, it's just quantum physics!
-The Doctor (Matt Smith)
Tags: humour doctor-who matt-smith arthur-darvill the-god-complex
This was supposed to be yesterday. I was sitting on the Cardiff/London train, supposedly about to write this very column, and realising something quite terrible. My head was entirely empty. A vast echoing void. Bigger on the inside, but with nothing in it. You could drop a pebble in my brain and wait for an hour to hear it land. No actually, you couldn't - that would be aggressive and unhelpful, so keep your damn pebbles to yourself.
Steven MoffatTags: humor writing humour magazine doctor-who train pebbles
All lives end. All hearts are broken. Caring is not an advantage.
Steven MoffatIt's a TV show. Only the emotional damage is real.
Steven MoffatHitler: Thank you, whoever you are. I think you just saved my life.
The Doctor: Believe me... It was an accident.
Tags: funny hitler doctor-who dr-who tardis
The Doctor: Dr. Song, you’ve got that face on again.
River: What face?
The Doctor: The ‘he’s hot when he’s clever’ face.
River: This is my normal face.
The Doctor: Yes, it is.
Tags: flirting doctor-who river-song eleventh-doctor
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