The whiskey kicked like a mugger.

Ken Bruen

Tags: drinking metaphor whiskey booze



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I decided to masturbate with shampoo instead of conditioner today. Because yolo. Things Jesus never said.

Dave Matthes

Tags: humor comedy hair bastard hilarious booze ass erotica erotic-romance conditioner



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An empty bottle of Jack is almost just as beautiful as a new and unopened bottle...in the same sense as looking down at muddied feet, and looking back the way you came. The journey you've taken to get to this point, the experiences and sights and music listened to, the shit scrolled down on paper. An empty bottle may hold more promise than a full one in that regard...

Dave Matthes

Tags: death ambition hope destruction drunk alcoholism booze bottle half-empty half-full



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Any respectable alcoholic, worth his salt, should wish to wake up dead.

Robert Black

Tags: booze robert-black



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Happiness is, waking up without a hangover.

Robert Black

Tags: booze hangovers



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The no-booze rule is one of several shams perpetuated by certain religious groups, presumably to keep their flocks in line. After all, what’s a shepherd to do with drunk sheep?
So take your medicine, but leave the booze on the shelf. We have a label to keep, and it’s not Jack Daniels. Don’t mourn for me. Just tell me what to do rather than teach me what to be. Slam another pill, pop that one last sedative…you’ll find me in the kitchen, washing my glass.

Chila Woychik

Tags: drinking booze religious-extremism post-traumatic-stress-disorder



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