The first way not to shake hands is executed by receiving someone’s hand in yours and proceeding to squeeze it tightly, hurting the other party as if they were responsible for a past death in your family, or your adoption as a child.
Wes LocherTags: humor funny comedy essay anecdote
Ever since the robot was first invented, there have been people who swear up and down that this marks the first step towards the fall of man … To be fair, their arguments are backed with scientific fact taken from documentary films such as The Terminator, The Matrix, and RoboCop.
Wes LocherTags: humor funny comedy essay anecdote
[The cats] scamper in front of my legs, causing me to fall and face plant into whatever furniture is closest. They especially like to play this game when I’m carrying piping hot coffee.
Wes LocherTags: humor funny comedy essay anecdote
Purple light passed over the paper, but nothing happened.
"Next!" Amy said. She was sure the man in black was going to burst in on them any second.
"Whoa!" Dan said.
Amy gripped his arm. "You found it?"
"No, but look! This whole essay - 'To the Royal Academy.' He wrote a whole essay on farts!" Dan grinned with delight. "He's proposing a scientific study on different fart smells. You're right, Amy. This guy was a genius!
Tags: humor essay ben-franklin amy-cahill dan-cahill fart
After all, this was the place where I’d had my first meaningful conversation with a female, it was the site of a football’s first encounter with my groin, and above all, it was the location where I was first punched in the face by a bully. Somewhere out there, a tooth of mine lay deep within the soil.
Wes LocherTags: humor funny comedy essay anecdote
this one-way rocket to Death in Adulthood" "Normal Time" in New California Writing
Michael ChabonTags: aging essay life-s-challenges
[It] began to seem amazing how often it was assumed that having a vagina automatically meant I was less intelligent, talented, capable, and interesting than the world's least interesting human being who happened to have a penis.
Francine ProseTags: essay feminisim burn-this-book
Men do what is called a good action, as some piece of courage or charity, much as they would pay a fine in expiation of daily non-appearance on parade. Their works are done as an apology or extenuation of their living in the world. I do not wish to expiate, but to live. My life is not an apology, but a life.
Ralph Waldo EmersonTags: essay transcendentalism
Tags: fiction virginia-woolf essay modern-fiction
For the film maker must come by his convention, as painters and writers and musicians have done before him.
Virginia WoolfTags: virginia-woolf essay cinema
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