My libido was doing the humpy dance while dressed in Milkbone pasties and a thong.
Nicole PeelerLife is just one small piece of light between two eternal darknesses.
Vladimir NabokovTags: humorous erotic insprirational
Leah" Olivia says quietly, "if you point at me again I'm going to break that manicured finger right off your hand. Now turn around and smile, your daughter is waking up.
Tarryn FisherEven though I dislike being kicked by others, I do enjoy the feeling of kicking others
Yana TobosoTags: humorous funny-but-true ironic-humor
Perhaps he was merely being friendly. Perhaps he saw the look on my face and mistook it for something else. Really what I wanted was the cigarette.
Margaret AtwoodTags: humorous
If you were an animal, what would you be?" I wrote, "A bumblebee trying to fuck a marble.
Wells TowerTags: humorous
Then the Miller fell off his horse.
Geoffrey ChaucerTags: humorous
Everything is uncomfortable for the first time: School, Smoking or Sex.
Aakash DeepTags: humorous
He’s an even-tempered stallion. What he lacks in stamina he makes up for in speed, kind of like most of the men I’ve slept with.
Lila ShawTags: humorous naughty-humor
[Artemis] returned to the aft bay for Mulch's version of a briefing.
The dwarf had drawn a crude diagram on a backlit wall panel. In fairness, there were more artistic chimpanzees. And less pungent ones. Mulch was using a carrot as a pointer, or more accurately, several carrots. Dwarfs liked carrots.
'This is Koboi Labs,' He mumbled around a mouthful of vegetable.
'That?' exclaimed Root.
'I realize, Julius, that it is not an accurate schematic.'
The Commander exploded from his chair. 'An accurate schematic? It's a rectangle for heaven's sake!'
Mulch was unperturbed. 'That's not important. This is the important bit.'
'That wobbly line?'
'It's a fissure,' pouted the dwarf. 'Anybody can see that.'
'Anybody in kindergarten maybe. So it's a fissure, so what?'
'This is the clever bit. Y'see that fissure is not usually there.'
Root began strangling the air again. Something he was doing more and more lately.
Tags: humor humorous diagram dwarf carrot-top
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