Gods prefer simple, vicious games, where you Do Not Achieve Transcendence but Go Straight To Oblivion; a key to the understanding of all religion is that a god's idea of amusement is Snakes and Ladders with greased rungs.

Terry Pratchett

Tags: religion destiny



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Pray to God, but row towards shore.

Lee Ezell

Tags: inspirational religion



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I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: Oh Lord, make my enemies ridiculous. And God granted it."

(Letter to Étienne Noël Damilaville, May 16, 1767)

Voltaire

Tags: humor religion satire prayers enmity ridicule social-justice social-life



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In heaven, all the interesting people are missing.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Tags: religion heaven



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I have as much authority as the Pope. I just don’t have as many people who believe it.

George Carlin

Tags: religion organized-religion



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As soon as a religion comes to dominate it has as its opponents all those who would have been its first disciples.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Tags: philosophy religion



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In religion and politics people’s beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without examination, from authorities who have not themselves examined the questions at issue but have taken them at second-hand from other non-examiners, whose opinions about them were not worth a brass farthing.

Mark Twain

Tags: politics religion beliefs



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I have good idea, for if you meet some person from different religion and he want to make argument about God. My idea is, you listen to everything this man say about God. Never argue about God with him. Best thing to say is, 'I agree with you.' Then you go home, pray what you want. This is my idea for people to have peace about religion.

Elizabeth Gilbert

Tags: god religion tolerance



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A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word 'darkness' on the walls of his cell.

C.S. Lewis

Tags: god religion



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I used to think that kid might become a preacher. Now I don't see how he's going to stay out of prison. Nobody in this family ever went to prison for sex crimes. He'd be the first."

Yes," says Jesus, "you never know about these things."

He and Grandpa are drinking cups of coffee and eating ginger snaps. Grandpa says, "When are you planning to return to earth?"

Soon as I finish this coffee," say Jesus. "Pretty good, isn't it.

Garrison Keillor

Tags: religion jesus



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