Have you noticed we can breathe in here too?
Gosh, I wouldn't have picked up on that.
Tags: breath sarcasm stupid question air smartass sarcastic
We came around the corner and stood in the doorway of what looked like a paint-testing ground. This was where we proved once and for all that we were good loving parents. We decided to let him live.
"What is painting doing in my best Tupperware bowl?" I yelled.
"Well, I needed something lightweight I could carry around with me," he began.
"You've been carrying around a brain for year," the boy's father said.
Tags: humor parents children sarcasm home-disasters
He paused at the bedroom door, shut his eyes, took a deep breath, and walked right out like it was any other morning, and he and Jack would be having breakfast as if they hadn't had sex the night before.
"Morning," he said, casting a quick glance over his shoulder.
"Mmm," D grunted.
"You done in the bathroom?"
D blinked. No, I jus' took a little breather in the middle a my mornin' beauty ritual ta come out here 'n' chat with ya. A course I'm done.
Tags: sarcasm awkwardness jane-seville morning-after
Marion: What is all this? What's going on?
Clint: The same thing that's always going on. The end of the world.
Tags: sarcasm comics doom-patrol the-end-of-the-world
Oh, poor, poor fellow!' said Mrs. Elliot with a remorse that was sincere, though her congratulations would not have been.
E.M. ForsterDon't you know that I passionately dote on every chin on his face?
Dorothy L. SayersTags: sarcasm irony faces appearance ugliness chins double-chins
You've read half the books in this house? This whole house?"
"Well, approximately half." Sticky said. "To be more accurate, I suppose I've read more like" - his eyes went up as he calculated - "three sevenths? Yes, three sevenths."
"Only three sevenths?" said Kate, pretending to look disappointed. "And here I was prepared to be impressed.
Tags: reading books funny sarcasm
But you have said it too often, Mr. Benedict!" said Mrs. Perumal in an imperious tone that was quite out of character. "And if you continue in this vein, I'm afraid we'll be compelled to cut our visit short. Surely there are other establishments that would host an entire troup of guests - indefinitely and without reward - and not feel obliged to apologize for it!
Trenton Lee StewartTags: funny sarcasm visitors guests host
Katniss: 'What about you? Ive seen you in the market. You can lift hundred pound bags of flour'. I snap at him
Tell him that. Thats not nothing.
Peeta: Yes and Im sure the arena will be full of bags of flour for me to chuck at people.
Never mumble some sarcastic shit to somebody who can obviously fuck you up.
Ice-TTags: sarcasm
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