Her name is Mackenzie. She’s got long blond hair and the biggest blue eyes you’ll ever see. She’s almost four. See her there? On the other end of the seesaw I’m currently riding.
Emma ChaseSome battles don’t have a winner. Sometimes the best a good general can hope for is a ceasefire
Emma ChaseMots clés inspirational humour
No man wants to f*ck a skeleton-and nibbling crackers and water like a prisoner of war at dinner isn't attractive.
Emma ChaseWhy do women always do this? Why are they so eager to blame themselves when someone treats them like sh*t? A guy would take a cheese grater to his tongue before admitting he screwed up.
Emma ChaseDid you mix the flour with water before you added it?”
Water? Martha didn’t say anything about water. That bitch.
In a nutshell: I control my dick. My dick does not control me. At least, that’s what I’ve been telling myself for the last hour and a half.
Emma ChaseAnd another thing—I’ve heard my sister and her little friends have their chats too. Some of the things that came out of their mouths could’ve made Larry fucking Flynt blush. So don’t act like women don’t talk just as much as us guys do…because I know for a fact they do.
Emma ChaseLet me repeat that in case you missed it:
ALL GUYS TALK TO THEIR FRIENDS ABOUT SEX.
If a guy tells you he doesn’t? Dump him, because he’s lying to you.
Two thoughts enter my head simultaneously.
The first is: God hates me. The second is: I have been a naughty, naughty boy for most of my life, and this is my payback. And you know what they say about payback, right?
Yep. She’s one hairy bitch.
And no girl wants to be called by the wrong name when she’s on her knees giving you head in the men’s room. So, just to be safe, I went with baby.
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