Call me Bitter Otter. It’s just a nickname I gave myself. However, a better descriptive and more realistic name for myself would be Tangy Walrus.
Jarod KintzI bought my groceries and they included free bags!
Jarod KintzI laughed so hard I nearly spit out my hot tea. The strange part was the fact that I was drinking coffee at that moment.
Jarod KintzThe last three inches of my penis shaft are perfect. Of course, the last three and the first three are one and the same.
Jarod KintzI want to gather up all the ink cartridges in the universe, because somewhere, mixed in with all that ink, is the next great American novel. And I’d love nothing more than to drink it.
Jarod KintzI always misspell the word “unique,” just to keep it youneeq.
Jarod KintzEat a donut in the face, not its asshole.
Jarod KintzI’m a student of life. My own. So I’m also my own teacher.
Jarod KintzI want to be the Everyman and take an IQ test and get a perfect 100.
Jarod KintzI want to grow a flower for every time someone tells me “F*** you.” Then I’ll go back to that person and pin the flower on their lapel in a gesture of friendship. And while they are looking down on it in astonishment, I’ll bunch up my knuckles and punch them in the face.
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