A Third's okay for a fuck, but not for a family. This isn't goddamned Big Love, Florida Fag Edition.

Tymber Dalton

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You have no right to run me out of here!"

"Yes, I do, because it's my house. I live here now."

He could have dropped his pants and taken a shit on the coffee table and it wouldn't have shocked her as much as that revelation.

"What?

Tymber Dalton


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In a fit of Christmas spirit, Kaden had equipped her with a red and green holiday collar, complete with several jingle bells.

Their own little pornographic elf.

Tymber Dalton


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Don't harsh the mellow.

Tymber Dalton


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This isn’t exactly a conversation two guys have over coffee. ‘Hey, dude, how well does your wife shave your balls?

Tymber Dalton


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Basic Carpentry in the afternoon, and Sadomasochism 101 in the evening.

Tymber Dalton


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I’m going to miss him like hell when he’s gone,” she eventually continued. “It’s going to rip half my soul out. If you weren’t here for me, I would fucking give up and die the minute he quit breathing.

Tymber Dalton


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I'm still not doing you

Tymber Dalton


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Some women need shoes. She needs whips.

Tymber Dalton


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Scary isn't even in the same fucking universe as what I'm feeling right now, dude." Ball-crawling heebie-jeebies might come close.

Tymber Dalton


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