You are one of the unfortunate ones whose body decays rapidly in the face of radiation poisoning. You hang your head over the toilet to vomit again and again, and die praying to the porcelain gods.
A.J. LauerMots clés humor science poison armageddon toilet radiation
Goodness, a girl steps out of the office for a couple days and the whole world ends!
A.J. LauerMots clés humor armageddon office
Zandy Brandy scented lotion - like the Normans, drunk and with soft hands!
A.J. LauerMots clés humor armageddon lotion normans
You stumble upon an unhappy Martian sentry on a mission and shoot ineffectually at his powersuit a few times before he pulps you with his laserbeam eyes and hideous poisonous-gas breath. Glory!
Daniel KeidlMots clés science-fiction glory armageddon laserbeam martian
Deciding to spit in the eye of every homely matron who ever warned her children not to stare into the sun directly, you crank the titanic telescope around to look directly towards the sun, the center of our solar system.
Daniel KeidlMots clés sun armageddon telescope matron
The front edge of the shockwave impacts the earth and you’re both shoved to your backs against the crumbling asphalt of the parking lot, and then crushed into oblivion as the Earth, along with every celestial body of your solar system, is disintegrated into tiny shards and then sucked unceremoniously into the resulting black hole.
Daniel KeidlMots clés science-fiction armageddon black-hole celestial-body
They really need to cite their sources, you think to yourself, which would make your seventh-grade science teacher proud if only he knew.
It’s a moot point, however.
Mots clés armageddon moot science-teacher
As the horde of ancient and mythical creatures impossibly descends upon you and dragonfire envelopes the land, you are forced to concede that it’s probably the very coolest way that you could die.
Daniel KeidlMots clés death dragon armageddon
YOUR LIFE HAS BEEN A MIX OF TRIUMPHS AND TOILS, CHALLENGES AND TESTS, AND YOU HAVE BEEN FOUND WORTHY. YOUR FAITH IN ME AND YOUR LOVING HEART ARE A TESTAMENT TO MY PEOPLE.
'Thank you, my God.'
COME, BE WITH ME. SIT WITH ME AT MY TABLE; JOIN ME IN RAPTURE. AND BRING YOUR CUTE FRIEND TOO.
Mots clés god rapture armageddon cute-friend
Oh, one more thing,' Thor calls out. 'If I know my prophecy, and I do, you beautiful ladies had best start looking for a boat!
Daniel KeidlMots clés mythology armageddon prophecy thor
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