I cook better than you," Nick corrected absently. "I think monkeys can probably be taught to cook better than you."
"I'd like to have a monkey that cooked for me," said Jamie. " I would pay him in bananas. His name would be Alphonse."
"I agree, that would be awesome." Mae said. "People would come for dinner just to see the monkey chef."
"You're raving," Nick said, defrosting chicken in the microwave. Mae was a bit impressed with how he seemed to look at the appliance and instantly comprehend its mysteries, when she'd been heating up ready-made meals for years by a method of pressing random buttons and hoping. " I know that's the only way Jamie communicates with people, but I expected better of you, Mavis."
"We're cutting out the whole Mavis thing right now, Nick," Mae said warningly.
"How many bananas would be good payment for a monkey?" Jamie wanted to know. " I would want to pay Alphonse a fair wage.

Sarah Rees Brennan

Mots clés funny monkeys

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Foul!" yelled Jamie, who seemed extremely happy not to be the one facing a blade. "Distracting technique! Put your shirt back on right now.

Sarah Rees Brennan

Mots clés funny

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It was safe to assume he'd not only read the play but then re-read it, cross-referenced the annotations, and probably joined an online chat group called Buds of the Bard or something equally nerdy

Simon Holt

Mots clés funny simon-holt soulstice

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I think you inhaled too much lead from those scantron sheets

Simon Holt

Mots clés funny aaron simon-holt soulstice

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Cole, for Christ's sake, will you stop staring at me like I'm beefcake of the month?

Simon Holt

Mots clés funny quinn simon-holt soulstice

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Coincidentally, a good age for a Japanese girl is younger than twenty five, because that's when she turns into a 'Christmas Cake'. Christmas cakes, as everyone knows, are desirable before the twenty fifth but afterward quickly become stale and are put on the shelf.

Andrew Davidson

Mots clés humor life women funny

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(Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?

Victor Borge

Mots clés humor funny humorous opera fat piano victor-borge victor borge singers

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I normally don't do requests. Unless, of course, I have been asked to do so.

Victor Borge

Mots clés humor funny humorous victor-borge victor borge requests

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One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.

Victor Borge

Mots clés humor funny humorous fire victor-borge victor borge fireplace

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(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?

Victor Borge

Mots clés humor funny humorous victor-borge victor borge sneeze

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