Tragic heroes are failed pragmatists. Their ends are unrealistic and their means are impractical.

Adam Phillips

Tag: heroes pragmatism



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If you want to be with somebody who gets you, you prefer collusion to desire, safety to excitement (sometimes good things to prefer but not always the things most wanted). The wish to be understood may be our most vengeful demand, may be the way we hang on, as adults, to the grudge against our mothers; the way we never let our mothers of the hook for their not meeting our every need. Wanting to be understood, as adults, can be, among many other things our most violent form of nostalgia.

Adam Phillips

Tag: nostalgia understanding mothers



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Believing in religion is like believing that adulthood is the solution to childhood.

Adam Phillips

Tag: religion childhood adulthood



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To grow up is to discover what one is unequal to.

Adam Phillips

Tag: growing-up equality discovery



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The past influences everything and dictates nothing.

Adam Phillips

Tag: past influence



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Anger, then, is only for the engaged; for those with projects that matter.

Adam Phillips

Tag: emotions anger engaged



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