I know what I want, Reed, and if you can’t give it to me…you’re shit out of luck. After what I’ve been through, I don’t care what you think you can do to me.
C.J. RobertsDealing with Caleb was all about perspective. You couldn’t appreciate his kindness until you’d felt his cruelty.
C.J. RobertsCaleb was a strange person, cruel and inhuman; a monster, and yet, at other times, he seemed so capable of something like caring. He made me cry and scream and shake with fear and nearly a split second later he could make me almost believe he wasn't responsible for any of it. He could hold me and make me feel safe. How was that possible?
C.J. RobertsTag: c-j-roberts
I wanted to stay here forever, held tight to his chest, his fingers stroking my hair, his heart beating against my ear: you're-safe, trust-me, love-you. Love. Did I want him to love me? Yes. I wanted someone to love me.
C.J. RobertsAbove all else, I had learned the one thing every person has to learn to make it through life: the only person you can truly count on is yourself.
C.J. Robertsthey say I tried to hurt my nurse. I tell them they tried to hurt me first.
C.J. RobertsI wrapped my arms around him and held on as hard as I could. He was my tormentor and my solace: the creator of the dark and the light within. I didn’t care that he would undoubtedly hurt me at any moment, right now; I just needed somebody to hold me… To tell me these exact words. Its going to be okay. It wasn’t of course, I knew that. But I didn’t care, I needed the lie.
C.J. RobertsPeople often believed they were safer in the light, thinking monsters only came out at night.
C.J. RobertsTag: dark light caleb captive-in-the-dark
Each day I was more vulnerable than the last. Each day he stripped away more of my sense of self. And now he'd taken the last of it, the last of me. But who did that make me? An extension of him? Someone new? I didn't know. Didn't want to know.
C.J. RobertsTag: caleb livvie captive-in-the-dark c-j-roberts the-dark-duet
Her words, her presence, and her pain, affected him. He hated it. His memories, the ones he worked so hard to push deep into forgotten recesses of his mind, banged on the door of his consciousness. They connected with Livvie, they connected to her suffering, and together, they threatened to undo him.
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