Nothing is perfect. Therefore, being perfect is being nothing… and that's a great way to lose weight.

Craig Benzine


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This quote will self-destruct in....4....3....2...1...Just kidding...Or am I?

Craig Benzine

Tag: humor funny youtube youtuber wheezy-waiter wheezywaiter



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People alive are better than people not alive.

Craig Benzine


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Failure is not an option. It just happens all the time. Like, all the time.

Craig Benzine

Tag: humor failure youtube youtuber wheezy-waiter wheezywaiter



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Visiting Saturn sounds like a lot of fun but you will die!

Craig Benzine

Tag: space youtube saturn youtuber wheezywaiter



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I'd choose truth over cake but I'd try to find a way to get both to be honest.

Craig Benzine

Tag: humor cake youtube youtuber wheezywaiter



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Time travel is awesome....And useful. That sentence had a typo when I typed it...The first time.

Craig Benzine

Tag: humor time-travel youtube youtuber wheezywaiter



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Cars and bumper cars are two very different things. NEVER sleep in a bumper car.

Craig Benzine

Tag: humor cars youtuber wheezywaiter



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Saving time is so important that I'm not even going to finish this sen-it's lunchtime already? Yum yum.

Craig Benzine

Tag: humor youtube youtuber wheezywaiter



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Nature is a porno. Deal with it.

Craig Benzine

Tag: humor nature funny wheezy-waiter wheezywaiter



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