Skulduggery stood among the ruins of what had once been a sofa. Valkyrie raised an eyebrow.
'I was trying to make up the sofa bed so you could get some rest,' he explained, and pointed to the second sofa across the room. 'Unfortunately, it would appear that that is the sofa bed, and this, apparently, is just a sofa.
Tag: humor furniture mistakes humorous funny-mistakes
Talking about one's feelings defeats the purpose of having those feelings. Once you try to put the human experience into words, it becomes little more than a spectator sport. Everything must have a cause, and a name. Every random thought must have a root in something else.
Derek LandyTag: words language futility conversation feelings psychoanalysis psychiatry talking
Just because an apple falls one hundred times out of a hundred does not mean it will fall on the hundred and first.
Derek LandyTag: science theories apple possibility anything-can-be gravity inevitability everything-is-possible anything-is-possible sir-isaac-newton
The fact is that we have no way of knowing if the person who we think we are is at the core of our being. Are you a decent girl with the potential to someday become an evil monster, or are you an evil monster that thinks it's a decent girl?"
"Wouldn't I know which one I was?"
"Good God, no. The lies we tell other people are nothing to the lies we tell ourselves.
Tag: truth perception lies self-deception personality good-and-evil villains truth-and-lies
He crouched at the care window and looked in. "What a lovely family you have. What a charming family. They're all lovely. Except for that one." His finger jabbed the glass. "That one's a bit ugly."
The American stepped towards him. "What? What did you say?"
"Oh, don't worry. I'm sure his personality makes up for his face.
Tag: humor family random insults humorous what-the-hell
It all depends on what people you're talking about helping. That's the wonderful think about just about every religion on the planet - they're all so incredibly selfish.
Derek LandyTag: perspective cynicism religion selfishness cynic skepticism helping-others
You are a cynical man, Mr. Pleasant."
"We live in cynical times, Miss Cain.
Tag: society cynic cynical the-world the-times accusation
Still, he figured, sometimes you've got to do what you've got to do, and then sometimes you've just got to run like hell after it's done.
Derek LandyTag: life danger responsibility life-lessons risks getting-things-done gotta-do-what-you-gotta-do
Valkyrie walked to the back door, which hadn't been closed properly, shut it and locked it. There was now a baby in the house, after all. She couldn't take the chance that a wild animal might wander in and make off with Alice, like those dingoes in Australia. She was probably being unfair to both dingoes and Australia, but she couldn't risk it. Locked doors kept the dingoes out, and that's all there was to it, even if she didn't know what a dingo actually was. She took out her phone, searched the Internet, found a picture of a baby dingo and now she really wanted a baby dingo for a pet.
Derek LandyTag: humor funny humorous australia precaution baby-safety child-safety dingo dingoes wild-animals
That's ridiculous. The only point in having enemies is so you can defeat them, kill them, brush them aside."
"Or give them a chance to redeem themselves.
Tag: enemies tolerance second-chances enemies-and-friends
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