Argh? Pathetic and inarticulate. Nice combination. Your mothers must be so proud.
Eoin ColferNow before we get into anything, ladies, no scratching, no spitting and no tattling to mummy.
Eoin ColferSig Sauer. Nine millimetres. Thirteen in the magazine. Big bullets. One of these hits you and it could blow your head off; something even the magic can't fix. Other than that you should be all right, presuming you remembered to wear the regulation above-ground micro-fibre jumpsuit recently patented by me. Then again, being a Recon jock, you probably didn't.
Eoin ColferStay back, human. You don't know what you're dealing with.
Eoin Colfer(to Foaly) Captain Short's life is in danger, so push the button before I climb that tower and push it with your face!
Eoin Colfer(text message) CMDR ROOT. TRBLE BELOW. HAVN OVRRN BY GOBLINS. PLCE PLAZA SRROUNDED. CUDGEON + OPL KBOI BHND PLOT. NO WPONS OR CMMUNICATIONS. DNA CNONS CNTRLLED BY KBOI. I M TRPPED IN OP BTH. CNCL THNKS IM 2 BLM. IF ALIVE PLSE HLP. IF NOT, WRNG NMBR.
Eoin Colfer(about Dr. Po) Just another quack spouting psychobabble.
Eoin ColferRemember this? You gave it to me for ensuring your trigger finger got reattached to your hand. You said it would remind me of that spark of decency inside me. I'm trying to do something decent now, Captain.
Eoin ColferGrab some caviar from the kitchen. You wouldn't believe the muck they feed us in Bartleby's for ten thousand a term.
Eoin ColferThe only other scenario that could explain everything, up to and including your own bizarre apperance, is a convoluted conspiracy theory involving the Russian Mafia and a crack team of plastic surgeons.
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