You'd be amazed how much research you can get done when you have no life whatsoever.
Ernest ClineTag: research
I felt like a kid standing in the world's greatest video arcade without any quarters, unable to do anything but walk around and watch the other kids play.
Ernest ClineI watched a lot of YouTube videos of cute geeky girls playing '80s cover tunes on ukuleles. Technically, this wasn't part of my research, but I had a serious cute-geeky-girls-playing-ukuleles fetish that I can neither explain nor defend.
Ernest ClineI would argue that masturbation is the human animal's most important adaptation. The very cornerstone of our technological civilization. Our hands evolved to grip tools, all right—including our own. You see, thinkers, inventors, and scientists are usually geeks, and geeks have a harder time getting laid than anyone. Without the built-in sexual release valve provided by masturbation, it's doubtful that early humans would have ever mastered the secrets of fire or discovered the wheel. And you can bet that Galileo, Newton, and Einstein never would have made their discoveries if they hadn't first been able to clear their heads by slapping the salami (or "knocking a few protons off the old hydrogen atom"). The same goes for Marie Curie. Before she discovered radium, you can be certain she first discovered the little man in the canoe.
Ernest ClineTag: anorak-s-almanac aa-241-87
For one quarter, Black Tiger lets me escape from my rotten existence for three glorious hours. Pretty good deal.
Ernest ClineTag: aa-23-234 anorak-s-almanac
Going outside is highly overrated.
Ernest ClineTag: anorak-s-almanac aa-17-32
Being human totally sucks most of the time. Videogames are the only thing that make life bearable.
Ernest ClineTag: anorak-s-almanac aa-91-1-2
It's chick flick disguised as a sword-and-sorcery picture. The only genre film with less balls is probably... freakin' Legend. Anyone who actually enjoys Ladyhawke is a bona fide USDA-choice pussy!
Ernest ClineTag: humour tom-cruise 80s-nostalgia matthew-broderick
Whenever I saw the sun, I reminded myself that I was looking at a star. One of over a hundred billion in our galaxy. A galaxy that was just one of billions of other galaxies in the observable universe. This helped me keep things in perspective.
Ernest ClineVirtual sex, no matter how realistic, was really nothing but glorified, computer-assisted masturbation.
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