Georgie, stop trying to resurrect the shoes. They were never alive in the first place.
Ilona AndrewsTag: humor kids ilona-andrews on-the-edge
It's a reflex. Hear a bell, get food. See an undead, throw a knife. Same thing, really.
Ilona AndrewsI gave him my best cryptic smile. He did not fall down to his feet, kiss my shoes, and promise me the world. I must be getting rusty.
Ilona AndrewsI've never created a riot before. I did cause a brawl at the last formal. A large number of young women there actually arrived with the expectation of seducing me into matrimony, and a couple of their mothers came to blows. It was hilari—I mean, dreadful. Simply dreadful.
Ilona AndrewsIt's awful to be rich and mind-boggingly handsome and have women fawn over you. My heart bleeds for you. Poor dear, how do you manage?
Ilona AndrewsYes, I'm too mad to punish you right now. We'll talk about it when we get home. Go brush your teeth, comb your hair, put on dry clothes, and get the guns. We're going to Wal-Mart.
Ilona AndrewsTag: on-the-edge
Hey, would you look at that shit?"
I turned on my heel. The patrons who’d fled at the first hint of trouble had come back and were enjoying the spectacle.
"Clear out!" I barked.
They paid me no mind. Asshole innocent bystanders.
Tag: humor paranormal
Here, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty...
Ilona AndrewsMen and swords. My father said that if you put any able-bodied man, no matter how peaceful, into a room with a sword and a practice dummy and leave him alone, eventually the man would pick up the sword and try to stab the dummy. It is human nature.
Ilona AndrewsWhy a raven?"
"To honor my father."
"The writing under it, is that Cyrillic?"
"Yes."
"What does it say?"
"Dar Vorona. Gift of the Raven. I am my father's gift."
"The raven is holding a bloody sword."
"I never said it was a nice gift.
Tag: kate-danials
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