What do you think?” she asked, pouting her lips attempting to imitate a model . . . or a duck. I wasn’t sure which.

Jamie McGuire

Tag: humor



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I found a Cairn Terrier online. It’s perfect.”

“A what?”

“Pidge is from Kansas. It’s the same kind of dog Dorothy had in the Wizard of Oz.”

Shepley’s face was blank. “The Wizard of Oz.”

“What? I liked the scarecrow when I was a little kid, shut the fuck up.”

“It’s going to crap every where, Travis. It’ll bark and whine and … I don’t know.”

“So does America … minus the crapping.

Jamie McGuire


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I still love you, Pidge.”
She didn’t look up. “Don’t. I’m not doing this for you.”
I sucked in a breath, physical pain shooting in all directions in my chest. “I know.

Jamie McGuire

Tag: thanksgiving abby travis-maddox pidgeon



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Say what you want. Being a psychotic asshole has it's perks.

Jamie McGuire


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Her expression turned serious. "In another life, I could love you."

I watched her for a moment, staring into her glassed-over eyes. She was drunk, but just for a moment it didn't seem wrong to pretend she meant it.

"I might love you in this one.

Jamie McGuire


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I told you we're close!"

"Yeah, so are me and my asshole! Doesn't mean I'm going to call it twice a day!

Jamie McGuire


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Welcome to the blood bath! If you are looking for Economics 101…you are in the wrong fucking place, my friend! If you seek the Circle, this is Mecca!

Jamie McGuire

Tag: humor



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Who can tell me which president had a cross-eyed wife with a bad case of the uglies?” Chaney asked.

Jamie McGuire

Tag: humor



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I even got a pretty good handle on which week I shouldn’t give her any extra shit, which fortunately for Shepley, was the same week not to fuck with America. That way, we had three weeks to not be on guard instead of two, and we could give each other fair warning.

Jamie McGuire


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Abby. She’s a pigeon. A demonic pigeon that fucks with my head so bad I can’t think straight. Nothing makes sense anymore, Cam. Every rule I’ve ever made’s getting broken one by one. I’m a pussy. No… worse. I’m Shep.

Jamie McGuire


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