A blanket could be used as a shield, in a fight with a cold shower. I know, because I won that battle this morning, only I wielded a sword—and an erection made of sleep.
Jarod KintzBricks could be used to promote social progress. If we could amass enough bricks to build a prison big enough to cage every citizen, then everybody would be equal. And I think our current political leadership is savvy enough to see this, and is taking steps to implement this as soon as possible.
Jarod KintzA brick could be used to replace the brother you never had. Well, it’s only a possibility, but you probably won’t like it, because as soon as your parents gain another child, you’ll quickly find out that you were only their favorite child because you were their only child.
Jarod KintzA brick could be used as a paperweight, if the words you wrote weren’t weighty enough to hold it down.
Jarod KintzA brick could be flipped over and turned endlessly. But it still won’t start your car.
Jarod KintzA brick could be used to prop up a wobbly table—or an unstable relationship. I wish I’d have thought of that before I got divorced.
Jarod KintzA brick could be used to foretell the future. Here’s my prediction: Tomorrow will happen. If I’m right, the brick was correct, and if I’m wrong, we’ll all be dead and my prognostication record remains unblemished.
Jarod KintzA blanket could be used to lay down the law. Lay it down over there, on top of the bed, and I’ll come over and enforce it.
Jarod KintzBricks could be used to neatly pack your suitcase. It would promote personal strength and frugality.
Jarod KintzA brick could be used like yellow sneezes hello every time love walks like a slinky down the stairs. Who used my shoe as a soup bowl?
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