Conrad and I were linked, we would always be linked. That wasn't something I could do away with. I knew that now- that love wasn't something you could erase, no matter how hard you tired.
Jenny HanI decided Conrad was right after all. Ilsa was meant to be with Laszlo. That was the way it was always supposed to end. Rick was nothing but a tiny piece of her past, a piece that she would always treasure, but that was all, because history is just that. History.
Jenny HanMaybe that was how it was with all first loves. They own a little piece of your heart, always. Conrad at twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, even seventeen years old. For the rest of my life, I would think of him fondly, the way you do your first pet, the first car you drove. Firsts were important.
Jenny HanTag: first-love
I don’t know if i’ll ever get you out of my system, not completely. I have… this feeling. That you’ll always be there. Here.
Jenny HanI loved him in a way you can really on do the first time around. It's the kind of love that doesn't know better and doesn't want to - it's dizzy and foolish and fierce.
Jenny HanBut just because you bury something, that doesn't mean it stops existing. Those feelings, they'd been there all along. All that time. I had to just face it.
Jenny HanIt's not all of a sudden," he said, his eyes locked on mine. "It's always.
Jenny HanI hoped I never saw him again. If I ever had to look at him again, if he looked at me the way he did that day, it would break me.
Jenny HanJag ville inte att min kärlek en dag skulle slockna som en fallande stjärna. Jag ville att den skulle brinna för alltid.
Jenny HanNär hon kom ut från duschen, påklädd och med blött hår,
tittade hon på mig med den där hoppfulla blicken, och jag tittade tillbaka som om jag inte kände igen henne.
Helt tom. Jag såg hur hennes blick slocknade. Jag såg hur hennes kärlek till mig dog.
Jag hade dödat den.
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