I guess I can't blame him for feeling bitter. Going from being the terror of Bulgarian nights to a janitor would kinda suck

Kiersten White

Tag: funny evie paranormalcy kiersten-white



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Being dead wasn't supposed to hurt. Where was the fairness in that? If I was dead, the least the universe could do was make it painless

Kiersten White

Tag: funny evie paranormalcy kiersten-white



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I hate the vamp jobs. They think they're so suave. It's not enough for them to slaughter and eat you like a zombie would. No, they want to be all sexy, too. And trust me: vampires? Not. Sexy.

Kiersten White

Tag: humor book vampires evie



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Tasers are a one-size-fits-all paranormal butt-kicking option. Mine’s pink with
rhinestones.

Kiersten White

Tag: humor book-evie



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...sometimes I get tired. Sometimes I get bored. And sometimes all I want, more than anything else in the world, is to go on a freaking date.

Kiersten White

Tag: loneliness dating



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If you fail to report within the next 12 hours. you will be terminated. If you attack any humans, you will be terminated. If you attempt to remove the tracking device, you will be terminated. We look forward to working with you.

Kiersten White

Tag: humor book evie



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Plus as she put it, Prince Eric was far too hairy and peach colored for her taste. I always thought he was pretty hott, but then again, I am a mammal.

Kiersten White

Tag: humor book evie



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Silver knives! Painful and sometimes deadly to all paranormals!'
'Tasey!' I counterd 'Hot pink and sparkly!

Kiersten White

Tag: humor books evie



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Yo soy carne muerta. Translation: I am dead meat.

Kiersten White

Tag: humor books evie



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Oh relax." I waved my hand dismissively. "If he wanted to kill me, he already would have. I brought him all these sharp pencils, ideal for stabbing, and he's been a perfect gentleman.

Kiersten White


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