Wherever he found his speech growing too modern -- which was about every sentence or two -- he ladled in a few such Scriptural phrases as "exceeding sore," "and it came to pass," etc., and made things satisfactory again. "And it came to pass" was his pet. If he had left that out, his Bible would have been only a pamphlet.

Mark Twain

Tag: humor scripture bible mark-twain



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One should never use exclamation points in writing. It is like laughing at your own joke.

Mark Twain

Tag: advice writing clever exclamation-point



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The coat of arms of the human race ought to consist of a man with an axe on his shoulder proceeding toward a grindstone. Or, it ought to represent the several members of the human race holding out the hat to each other. For we are all beggars. Each in his own way. One beggar is too proud to beg for pennies but will beg a loan of dollars, knowing he can’t repay; another will not beg a loan but will beg for a postmastership; another will not do that but will beg for an introduction to “society”; one, being rich, will not beg a hod of coal of the railway company but will beg a pass; his neighbor will not beg coal, nor pass, but in social converse with a lawyer will place before him a supposititious case in the hope of getting an opinion out of him for nothing; one who would disdain to beg for any of these things will beg frankly for the presidency. None of the lot is ashamed of himself, but he despises the rest of the mendicants. Each admires his own dignity, and carefully guards it, but in his opinion the others haven’t any.

Mark Twain


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Seien Sie vorsichtig mit Gesundheitsbüchern - Sie könnten an einem Druckfehler sterben.

Mark Twain


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Vergangenheit ist, wenn es nicht mehr weh tut.

Mark Twain


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من لا يريد القراءة ليس بأفضل ممن لا يستطيع القراءة

Mark Twain

Tag: reading literacy



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Censorship is telling a man he can't have a steak just because a baby can't chew it.

Mark Twain

Tag: censorship



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Yes, take it all around, there is quite a good deal of information in the book. I regret this very much; but really it could not be helped.
-from the Prefatory

Mark Twain


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Conformity—the natural instinct to passively yield to that vague something recognized as authority.

Mark Twain

Tag: conformity



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You can't pray a lie -- I found that out.

Mark Twain


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