Rubbish!" screamed a fat, elderly woman, in Richard's ear, as he passed her malodorous stall. "Junk!" She continued. "Garbage! Trash! Offal! Debris! Come and get it! Nothing whole or undamaged! Crap, tripe, and useless piles of shit. You know you want it.

Neil Gaiman

Tag: humor trash



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She smiled again. "Do you like cat?" she said.
"Yes," said Richard. "I quite like cats."
Anaesthesia looked relieved. "Thigh?" she asked, "or breast?

Neil Gaiman

Tag: humor cats



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For a moment he thought she was about to hit him, which would have been bad, or even start crying, which would have been much, much worse.

Neil Gaiman


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I'm going to go home. Everything is going to be normal again. Boring again. Wonderful again.

Neil Gaiman


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Fat Charlie wondered what Rosie's mother would usually hear in a church. Probably just cries of "Back! Foul best of Hell!" followed by gasps of "Is it alive?" and a nervous inquiry as to whether anybody had remembered to bring the stakes and hammers.

Neil Gaiman

Tag: humor church



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Never mind. There. For good or bad. It's done.

Neil Gaiman


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Nearly' only counts in horseshoes and hand-grenades.

Neil Gaiman

Tag: success failure achievements luck near-hits near-misses nearly



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Death’s a funny thing. I used to think it was a big, sudden thing, like a huge owl that would swoop down out of the night and carry you off. I don’t anymore. I think it’s a slow thing. Like a thief who comes to your house day after day, taking a little thing here and a little thing there, and one day you walk round your house and there’s nothing there to keep you, nothing to make you want to stay. And then you lie down and shut up forever. Lots of little deaths until the last big one.

Neil Gaiman


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The sky had never seemed so sky; the world had never seemed so world.

Neil Gaiman

Tag: literary



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There's a but, isn't there?" said Coraline. "I can feel it. Like a rain cloud.

Neil Gaiman

Tag: literary



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