Dan: You've ruined my life.
Anna: You'll get over it.

Patrick Marber


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I think you owe me something for deceiving me so exquisitely.

Patrick Marber


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What's so great about the truth? Try lying for a change, it's the currency of the world.

Patrick Marber


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I don't want to lie. I can't tell the truth. So it's over.

Patrick Marber


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Have you ever seen a human heart? It looks like a fist, wrapped in blood! Go fuck yourself!

Patrick Marber


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Deception is brutal, I'm not pretending otherwise.

Patrick Marber


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Alice: It's the only way to leave. "I don't love you anymore. Goodbye."
Dan: Supposing you do still love them?
Alice: You don't leave.

Patrick Marber


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We arrive with our...'baggage' and for a while they're brilliant, they're 'Baggage Handlers.' We say, 'Where's your baggage?' They deny all knowledge of it...'They're in love'...they have none. Then...just as you're relaxing...a Great Big Juggernaut arrives...with their baggage. It Got Held Up. One of the greatest myths men have about women is that we overpack.

Patrick Marber


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Thank God life ends—we'd never survive it. From Big Bang to weary shag, the history of the world. Our flesh is ferocious...our bodies will kill us...our bones will outlive us.

Patrick Marber


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That's the most stupid expression in the world. 'I fell in love'—as if you had no choice. There's a moment, there's always a moment; I can do this, I can give in to this or I can resist it. I don't know when your moment was but I bet there was one.

Patrick Marber


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