We insist on being Someone, with a capital S. We get security from defining ourselves as worthless or worthy, superior or inferior. We waste precious time exaggerating or romanticizing or belittling ourselves with a complacent surety that yes, that’s who we are. We mistake the openness of our being—the inherent wonder and surprise of each moment—for a solid, irrefutable self. Because of this misunderstanding, we suffer.

Pema Chödrön


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The essence of bravery is being without self-deception.

Pema Chödrön


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Things are as bad and as good as they seem. There's no need to add anything extra.

Pema Chödrön


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Letting there be room for not knowing is the most important thing of all. When there's a big disappointment, we don't know if that's the end of the story. It may just be the beginning of a great adventure. Life is like that. We don't know anything. We call something bad; we call it good. But really we just don't know.

Pema Chödrön

Tag: buddhism spirituality healing unknown new-beginnings



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It's hard to know whether to laugh or to cry at the human predicament. Here we are with so much wisdom and tenderness, and—without even knowing it—we cover it over to protect ourselves from insecurity. Although we have the potential to experience the freedom of a butterfly, we mysteriously prefer the small and fearful cocoon of ego.

Pema Chödrön

Tag: buddhism humanity confusion



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Even though peak experiences might show us the truth and inform us about why we are training, they are essentially no big deal. If we can't integrate them into the ups and downs of our lives, if we cling to them, they will hinder us. We can trust our experiences as valid, but then we have to move on and learn how to get along with our neighbors. Then even the most remarkable insights can begin to permeate our lives. As the twelfth-century Tibetian yogi Milarepa said when he heard of his student Gampopa's peak experiences, 'They are neither good not bad. Keep meditation.'

Pema Chödrön

Tag: buddhism



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As the twelfth-century Tibetian yogi Milarepa said when he heard of his student Gampopa's peak experiences, 'They are neither good nor bad. Keep meditating.'

Pema Chödrön

Tag: buddhism detachment



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Once you create a self-justifying storyline, your emotional entrapment within it quadruples.

Pema Chödrön

Tag: self-image self-righteousness self-justification



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Without loving-kindness, staying in pain is just warfare.

Pema Chödrön


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Pain is not a punishment, pleasure is not a reward.

Pema Chödrön


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