One of the easiest forms of pretense to break down is the pretense of enthusiasm for exotic foods. Just bring on the exotic foods.

Robert Benchley


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We are constantly being surprised that people did things well before we were born.

Robert Benchley


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I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.

Robert Benchley


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Streets flooded. Please advise.

Robert Benchley

Tag: travel telegram venice



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One, two, three / Buckle my shoe.

Robert Benchley

Tag: humor rhyme surreal



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It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.

Robert Benchley

Tag: writing fame



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The free-lance writer is one who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps.

Robert Benchley

Tag: on-writing



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As the storm came nearer I began to realize that I hadn't made the most of my three years' immunity. In fact, I hadn't done a single thing about cleaning up my life. I was, if anything, an even more logical target for lightning than the last time I was in range. And thunderstorms don't creep up on you at seven o'clock in the morning in a non-thunderstorm country for nothing, you know. I lined up a rather panicky schedule of reforms...
But as the storm suddenly petered out and went off in the other direction nothing much has come out of it yet. I may have three years more, and these things can't be rushed.

Robert Benchley

Tag: lightning



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The problem of what to wear while lolling about the house on a Sunday afternoon is becoming more and more acute as the fashions in lolling garments change. The American home is in danger of taking on the appearance of an Oriental bordello.

Robert Benchley

Tag: fashion lolling



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The only cure for a real hangover is death.

Robert Benchley

Tag: death drinking hangovers



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