There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good.

Stephen Colbert

Tag: history



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If I had a dime for everytime that I was wrong, I'd be broke.

Stephen Colbert


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I like the fact of John McCain's head being severed. Like that it will fit so much more nicely up George Bush's butt!

Stephen Colbert


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Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash.
(Said to President Bush at the White House Correspondents Dinner)

Stephen Colbert

Tag: humor politics



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Oliver Cromwell can kiss my singing emerald scrotum!

Stephen Colbert


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President Bush, have a hot dog with me.

Stephen Colbert

Tag: bush colbert



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(Rush are) like the JD Salinger of Canadian Prog Rock

Stephen Colbert


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Here's how it works: the president
makes decisions. He's the decider.
The press secretary announces those
decisions, and you people of the press
type those decisions down. Make,
announce, type. Just put 'em through
a spell check and go home. The greatest
thing about this man is he's steady.
You know where he stands. He believes
the same thing Wednesday that he believed
on Monday, no matter what happened Tuesday.
Events can change; this man's beliefs never will.

Stephen Colbert


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I may not agree with what you have to say but I will fight you to the death for the right to fight you to the death.

Stephen Colbert


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All Dogs Go To Heaven? Sorry, kids. It's only the dogs who've accepted Christ.

Stephen Colbert

Tag: humor truth



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