But then his parents changed. A year of California had changed them. They stopped sending money. Greg was forced to go out into the world, to interact with real people. And he was glad of this. He had always wanted to be a normal person. To be at ease in society. He had just been too scared to try. But now he was forced to, and so he did–he went and got a job at the public library. He was not quite a librarian, but close. Greg was a shelver. There would be carts of books to shelve, then there would be no more carts of books to shelve, then there would be carts of books to shelve.
As a shelver, Greg felt that life was passing him by in a slow and distant, but massive, way–like the moon.
Lately, they were always reassuring each other that nothing was wrong; and probably it was true—life wasn’t supposed to be incredible, after all. Life wasn’t some incredible movie. Life was all the movies, ever, happening at once. There were good ones, bad ones, some went straight to video.
Tao LinAmoeba ass is so hot.
Tao LinIt sometimes seemed to him that for love to work, it had to be fair, that he should tell only half the joke, and she the other half. Otherwise, it would not be love, but something completely else–pity or entertainment, or stand-up comedy.
Tao LinTag: love relationships jokes
Life, people learned, was not easy. Life was not cake. Life was not a carrot cake.
Tao LinDo you sometimes look up from the computer and look around the room and know you are alone, I mean really know it, then feel scared ?
Tao LinWe have been sitting here all night bullshitting and we still don’t know what to do.
Tao Linnote the similarities with buddhism
a buddhist who has achieved nirvana is not sad
primarily because it does not know the concept
of sad [...]
Though she’d begun to get a bit fat that winter, it was in February, around when her father found a toy poodle (sitting there, in the side yard, watchful and waiting as a person), and adopted it, that a weightlessness entered into Chelsea’s blood—an inside ventilation, like a bacteria of ghosts—and it was sometime in the fall, before her 23rd birthday, that her heart, her small and weary core, neglected now for years, vanished a little, from the center out, took on the strange and hollowed heaviness of a weakly inflated balloon.
Tao LinTag: loneliness toy-poodle
I won,” said Chelsea’s dad, and went to give Chelsea a high-five, but missed, as they were standing too close.
“My fault,” he said. “That was my fault.”
“Oh,” Chelsea said.
And he stepped back a little and tried again, but Chelsea, distracted now by something—maybe the plant in the far corner, standing and waiting like a person in a dream; or maybe the green shoe or some other thing that was out there and longing, to be looked at, and taken—wasn’t ready, and their hands, his then hers, passed through the air in a kind of wave, a little goodbye.
Tag: loneliness daughters dads
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