Daily I walk around my small, picturesque town with a thought bubble over my head: Person Going Through A Divorce. When I look at other people, I automatically form thought bubbles over their heads. Happy Couple With Stroller. Innocent Teenage Girl With Her Whole Life Ahead Of Her. Content Grandmother And Grandfather Visiting Town Where Their Grandchildren Live With Intact Parents. Secure Housewife With Big Diamond. Undamaged Group Of Young Men On Skateboards. Good Man With Baby In BabyBjörn Who Loves His Wife. Dogs Who Never Have To Worry. Young Kids Kissing Publicly. Then every so often I see one like me, one of the shambling gaunt women without makeup, looking older than she is: Divorcing Woman Wondering How The Fuck This Happened.
Suzanne FinnamoreTag: marriage husband infidelity divorce seperation cheating
I feel incendiary, a wildfire. My spirit licks at the gates of a very elaborate, customized, and distracting emotional Hades.
Suzanne FinnamoreTag: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
Très, très, triste...
Suzanne FinnamoreTag: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
Naturally, I do blame Françoise. I blame her for having N in the first place. She was young, she was beautiful, she was married to a doctor, and she was intelligent. She could have abstained from producing her first son. It was wrong on a variety of levels.
Suzanne FinnamoreTag: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
How can I grieve what is still in motion?" I ask her. "Shoes are still dropping all over the place. I´m not kidding," I say. "It´s Normandy out there.
Suzanne FinnamoreTag: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up grieving cheating
I used to loathe ambivalence; now I adore it. Ambivalence is my new best friend.
Suzanne FinnamoreTag: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
Yes. THANK YOU. And say hello to Judas Iscariot.
Suzanne FinnamoreTag: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
I love you as the mother of my child": the kiss of death.
Mother of His Child: demotion. I am beginning to see this truism: Mothers are not always wives. I have been stripped of a piece of self.
Tag: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
People told me not to get married; I didn´t listen. No one ever listens, it seems to me now. Perhaps people should stop trying to communicate. N was not a communicator; early on, I´d insisted on communication. Now I see his point acutely. I would love to have him back to not communicate with me. I would never ask for communication again, I would simply go elsewhere for the deep fish. Also, I´m not at all sure I want to hear what he has to say in this new vista. This works out well.
Suzanne FinnamoreTag: marriage husband infidelity divorce seperation cheating
I should have known then it wasn´t nothing, as he called it. But I was eight months pregnant. No sense closing the barn door now, or so I thought. I swallowed the nothing, straightaway after the usual tears and denial.
Suzanne FinnamoreTag: marriage husband infidelity divorce seperation cheating
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