Aw, kiss him, Gwen, clamored a hundred perky eggs. Shut up, she rebuked. We don't even know him, and until moments ago we thought he was dead. That's no way to start a relationship.
Karen Marie MoningTag: kiss humorous eggs karen-marie-moning gwen drustan kiss-of-the-highlander
Self-pity is the hens' besetting sin," remarked Mr. Payton. "Foolish fowl. How they came to achieve anything as perfect as the egg I do not know! I cannot fathom.
Elizabeth EnrightTag: humor sin self-pity eggs chickens
I'm hungry.'
'Me too.'
'Will you get us something to eat?'
'I suppose I could take a look around. Maybe find a baby bird or a dead squirrel, or something. One word about a quiche, and I'll kill you.'
'While you're up there, try to find some nice, soft grasses we can sit on and be more comfortable.'
'Yes, comrade.
...
Here. I found some eggs to suck on.'
'Did you remember to get the grasses?'
'No. I forgot.'
'Are you going to get the grasses?'
'Can I eat first?'
'I don't know why you say you'll do things if you don't mean it.'
'I MEANT it! I just FORGOT!'
'You can get the grasses after you finish eating.'
'Thank you.'
'And try to find some water. We're going to need water if we plan on hiding out here.'
'YES COMRADE! ANYTHING ELSE?'
...
'Y'know, we could've had these eggs in a quiche!
Tag: humour eggs quiche stupid-stupid-rat-creatures
Comedy is, of course, closely associated with eggs.
Harlan TarbellSoon they were all sitting on the rocky ledge, which was still warm, watching the sun go down into the lake. It was the most beautiful evening, with the lake as blue as a cornflower and the sky flecked with rosy clouds. They held their hard-boiled eggs in one hand and a piece of bread and butter in the other, munching happily. There was a dish of salt for everyone to dip their eggs into.
‘I don’t know why, but the meals we have on picnics always taste so much nicer than the ones we have indoors,’ said George.
Tag: food nature eating outdoors meals eggs evening picnics indoors
So familiar are eggs to us, however, that in the eighteenth century they were referred to as cackling farts, on the basis that chickens cackled all the time and eggs came out of the back of them.
Mark ForsythTag: breakfast eggs chickens farts
I told you that my idea was great."
"They usually are."
"Holy [crap]. Did you just admit that?"
"Maybe I did."
"Uh-huh, you've always known my ideas hit a ten."
"On a scale of 1 to 100, yes."
"Ha.Ha. Guess what.Got another idea."
"Does it involve eggs?"
"It doesn't involve eggs."
"It doesn't?"
"But it does involve something equally tasty. And it involves you, me, a bed, and very little, if any, clothing.
DAMN MY EGGS! DAMN ALL THE EGGS THAT EVER WAS!" -Wilson
Lorraine HansberryTag: eggs damn wilson hansberry lorraine
Don't pull all your eggs in one basket.
American proverb.Tag: eggs
From that evening, Swann understood that the feeling which Odette had once had for him would never revive, that his hopes of happiness would not be realised now. And the days on which, by a lucky chance, she had once more shewn herself kind and loving to him, or if she had paid him any attention, he recorded those apparent and misleading signs of a slight movement on her part towards him with the same tender and sceptical solicitude, the desperate joy that people reveal who, when they are nursing a friend in the last days of an incurable malady, relate, as significant facts of infinite value: "Yesterday he went through his accounts himself, and actually corrected a mistake that we had made in adding them up; he ate an egg to-day and seemed quite to enjoy it, if he digests it properly we shall try him with a cutlet to-morrow,"--although they themselves know that these things are meaningless on the eve of an inevitable death.
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