Haskell to Quinlin
You need anything, Quin, absolutely anything, you call me and I'll be there. Remember, friends help you move. Good friends help you move a body. Best friends bring their own shovel. You say the word, and I'll be there with a spanking new shovel. Or holy water and an exorcism ritual. Whatever works.
Tag: funny
Yes, I kidnapped that Lindberg baby.
Chuck PalahniukWhatever you do, in the privacy of your own rain shower, is your own business
Gregory David RobertsWho are you and how did you get in here?" "I'm a locksmith. And, I'm a locksmith.
Leslie NielsenTag: humor funny comedy locksmith
Well,” said the frog, “what are you going to do about it?”
“Marrying Therandil? I don’t know. I’ve tried talking to my parents, but they won’t listen, and neither will Therandil.”
“I didn’t ask what you’d said about it,” the frog snapped. “I asked what you’re going to do. Nine times out of ten, talking is a way of avoiding doing things.
Tag: funny actions-over-words frog
OY! Stop playing around and lets cook already!"
*smack*
J-just now, that made a really loud noise.."
Do you wanna hear it again?"
N-no, you'll just hit me again!"
Kyo and Tohru
Tag: humor funny noise smack cook loud tohru basket fruits kyo hit kyou
Life is better than death, I believe, if only because it is less boring, and because it has fresh peaches in it.
Alice WalkerTag: life death funny peaches alice-walker
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button.
Sam LevensonTag: humor death heaven funny die elevator sam-levenson
But Dumbledore says he doesn't care what they do as long as they don't take him off the Chocolate Frog cards.
J.K. RowlingTag: funny fame celebrity dumbledore
The Death Eaters can't all be pure-blood, there aren't enough pure-blood wizards left," said Hermione stubbornly. "I expect most of them are half-bloods pretending to be pure. It's only Muggle-borns they hate, they'd be quite happy to let you and Ron join up"
"There is no way they'd let me be a Death Eater!" said Ron indignantly...."My whole family are blood traitors! That's as bad as Muggle-borns to Death Eaters!"
"And they'd love to have me," said Harry sarcastically. "We'd be best pals if they didn't keep trying to do me in.
Tag: humor funny wizards death-eaters muggles blood-traitors muggle-born
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