I can’t believe he’s making you wait till January for an appointment.”
“I could threaten to bomb the school. That’d get me in quicker.
Earthquakes were extremely uncommon in this area. A dragon and a unicorn playing tag wasn't.
Robert Lynn AsprinPlease ta meetcha, kid. I'm Aahz."
"Oz?"
"No Relation."
"No relation to what?" I asked, but he was examining the room again.
Tag: funny
Reality Sucks, I want my dreams back.
Sandra Chami KassisTag: wisdom life future reality people inspirational-quotes ambition dreams funny sarcasm-humor
Tolerance! The virtue that makes one bite his tongue so that he can tear out his hair.
Criss JamiTag: humor truth honesty silence virtue funny tolerance dishonesty funny-but-true virtue-signalling
It’s only sixteen ninety-five," I say with a flutter of my lashes.
"You’re serious."
I prop my hands on my waist and stick out a hip, striking a pose worthy of a supermodel. "Look at me. Don’t I look serious?"
She collapses into the chair outside the dressing room in a fit of giggles so cute they make my insides fizz. "No! You must be stopped," she says.
"Why?" I strut down an aisle of yellowed lingerie, swiveling my hips, batting bras with flicks of my fingers. "I will be the king of the disco. I will be—" I spin and strike another pose. "An inspiration."
She sniffs and swipes at her eyes. "The real Dylan would die before he’d be seen in public in something like that."
"The real Dylan is boring." I brace my hands on the arms of her chair and lean down until our faces are a whisper apart. "And he’s not one fourth the kisser I am."
"Is that right?" Her lips quirk.
"You know it is."
Her smile melts, and her breath comes faster. "Yeah. I do.
Were I forced to describe this woman in one word, that word would be...herpes.
Jen LancasterTag: funny
Think your mother will let me drive you to school tomorrow? Now that we're all friends and united by a belief in the careful use of contraception?"
My cheeks burn, the memory of my mother's mortifying behavior distracting me for a moment. "Yes," I mumble. "I think so.
I want to woo you with food now that I've wooed you with words, song, and the magic of my interpretive dance.
Stacey JayDid you know, the Alpha bond is a lot like the mate bond. The first twenty-four hours are apparently intense. I took oath from ten wolves today, and I can feel every fucking one of them in my head. And I use the adjective on purpose. You know what the most common response to facing death is?"
Simon let out a little snort.
Aaron's grin was wry. "Yeah, that. And when you consider that one of my wolves is Lucas, I haven't been this horny in about thirty years.
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