You are the Energizer Bunny for badasses. -Ash

Sherrilyn Kenyon

Tag: humor funny



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I'm a happy person. If you want to be around me, you can either choose to be happy too, or follow the signs to the nearest exit!

Sharon Swan

Tag: humor happiness funny happy exit-ghost



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I beg your pardon; I am drunk without a drink. English wine

Santosh Kalwar

Tag: man funny english drink vulnerable



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Stairs," Valkyrie said, disappointed.
"Not just ordinary stairs," Skulduggery told her as he led the way down. "Magic stairs."
"Really?"
"Oh, yes."
She followed him into the darkness. "How are they magic?"
"They just are."
"In what way?"
"In a magicky way."
She glared at the back of his head. "They aren't magic at all, are they?"
"Not really.

Derek Landy

Tag: humor funny magic conversation stairs valkyrie derek-landy skulduggery-pleasant



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And my piece of advice is...don't flirt with any of the female instructors. They all have access to weapons bigger than yours.

Simone Elkeles

Tag: advice funny weapons



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The human body is the best work of art.

Jess C. Scott

Tag: humor art honesty passion beauty youth humour funny lust fashion body girl desire food-for-thought young-adult fitness body-image young lust-for-life hip-hop dancer young-adults



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There are several theories on sex and all of them are lies.

Santosh Kalwar

Tag: theories lies sex funny



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You are my flesh and blood and I have always doted on you, but right now I would have to say you deserve a haughty, ruined chit for your own and she deserves you.

Mary Balogh

Tag: funny mary-balogh a-matter-of-class mr-mason



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Instead of committing suicide, people go to work.

Thomas Bernhard

Tag: humor inspirational funny



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She sighed. Loudly. "Physical appearance is not what is important."
Yeah right. Tell that to any girl who hasn't bothered to put on a presentable shirt or fix her hair because she's only running into the grocery store to get a quart of milk for her grandmother, and who does she see tending the 7-ITEMS-OR-LESS cash register but the guy of her dreams, except she can't even say hi—much less try to develop a meaningful relationship—since she looks like the poster child for the terminally geeky.

Vivian Vande Velde

Tag: girls funny appearance geek heir-apparent



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