Smiling always seems to annoy people more than actually insulting them. Or maybe I just have an annoying smile.

Jim Butcher

Tag: smiling humorous insulting annoy

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The workings of the male mind are twisted indeed." Winnifred Crane

Kate Noble

Tag: romance humorous historical-romance

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Damn, Marcus, how much have you been working out? You have the ass of a god.

He turned to face her, and naturally her gaze fell to his jewels. She shook her head and sighed. You warriors are so fucking hung and I really do need a man.

Caris Roane

Tag: humorous

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If you don't have any feelings for Will Darcy, why are you blushing and fixing your hair?

Elizabeth Eulberg

Tag: humorous lizzie charlotte darcy

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A friend told me that one day he and I would be rich and famous. I told him that I'd trade my half of the fame, for his half of the money.

Quentin R. Bufogle

Tag: money fame humorous

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Does my grandma count as a bodyguard?

Holly Hood

Tag: humorous

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Mary Lou et moi, on est amies depuis qu’on est toutes petites. J’étais le boute-en-train de service, et elle, le cancre de la classe. « Cancre » n’est peut-être pas le mot juste. Disons que ses objectifs n’étaient pas très hauts. Elle voulait se marier et fonder une famille. Et si elle pouvait épouser le capitaine d’une équipe de foot, c’était encore mieux. [...]
Moi, à la même époque, je rêvais d’épouser Aladin pour qu’il m’emmène sur son tapis volant. Donc, vous voyez : on n’avait pas les mêmes valeurs.

Janet Evanovich

Tag: humorous

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Was it fate? Was it destiny?"
"I think it was Alan Blunt.

Anthony Horowitz

Tag: humorous

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Do you know why Satan is so angry all the time? Because whenever he works a particularly clever bit of mischief God uses it to serve his own Rigteous purposes."
"So God uses wicked people as his tools?"
"God gives us the freedom to to do great evil, if we choose, then He uses his own freedom to create goodness out of that evil, for that is what He chooses."
"So, in the long run, God always wins?"
"Yes, in the short run though it can be uncomfortable.

Orson Scott Card

Tag: inspirational humorous graff sister-carlotta

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He pulled out a dagger from ... she wasn't sure where. Did he have that in his loin cloth? What else does he have in there?

(Amy's thoughts, The Witching Pen)

Dianna Hardy

Tag: humor paranormal-romance humorous amy dianna-hardy the-witching-pen

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