On the way home, I saw a fist fight between an adverb and a pair of parentheses.
I kept on walking.

Peter James West

Tag: inspirational writing humour writing-life



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I am the sum of my past experience.
Some people have got a lot to answer for.

Peter James West

Tag: inspirational writing humour writing-life



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Drafting is like painting the Golden Gate Bridge.
The closer you get to the end, the more you start to worry about the beginning.

Peter James West

Tag: inspirational writing humour writing-life



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Cave basilischium! The rex of serpenti, tant pleno of poison that it all shines dehors! Che dicam, il veleno, even the stink comes dehors and kills you! Poisons you...And it has black spots on his back, and a head like a coq, and half goes erect over the terra, and half on the terra like the other serpents. And it kills the bellula...'

'The bellula?'

'Oc! Parvissimum animal, just a bit plus longue than the rat, and also called the musk-rat. And so the serpe and the botta. And when they bite it, the bellula runs to the fenicula or to the cicerbita and chews it, and comes back to the battaglia. And they say it generates through the oculi, but most say they are wrong.'

I asked him what he was doing with a basilisk and he said that was his business.

Umberto Eco

Tag: humour macaronic



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Now you here and dealing not with him, who is dead, but with me, who is sitting here.”

“But,” he said in exasperation, “that’s not the way it should be.”

“I agree,” Janie King said.
“You agree,” he said, showing some surprise in his voice.

“Yes,” said Janie with a smile. “No idiot should ever be in your position. But since an idiot is and I am dealing with him, it is bloody unfortunate for us both.” She rose.

David Adams Richards River of the Brokenhearted

David Adams Richards

Tag: humour



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And don't succumb too much to the spell of these cases. I have seen many other fragments of the cross, in other churches. If all were genuine, our Lord's torment could not have been on a couple of planks nailed together, but on an entire forest.'

'Master!' I said, shocked.

'So it is, Adso. And there are ever richer treasuries. Some time ago, in the cathedral of Cologne, I saw the skull of John the Baptist at the age of twelve.'

'Really?' I exclaimed, amazed. Then, siezed by doubt, I added, 'But the Baptist was executed at a more advanced age!'

'The other skull must be in another treasury,' William said, with a grave face. I never understood when he was jesting.

Umberto Eco

Tag: christianity humour



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Walking out of an A level paper isn't funny."
"It's not that I'm laughing at."
"So what is it?"
"No one ever tells you when you're doing all that course work and revision and timed essays and study skills that it's an option."
"But it isn't an option."
"It is, because I just took it.

Rosamund Lupton

Tag: humour funny study



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Den Hunde, sagte Bonpland, habe er nie leiden können.

Daniel Kehlmann

Tag: humour exploration



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Inzwischen geht es ihm besser, manche Tage seien schon fieberfrei, auch die Träume, in denen er Baron Humboldt erwürge, zerhacke, erschieße, anzünde, vergifte oder unter Steinen begrabe, würden seltener.

Daniel Kehlmann

Tag: humour



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Links, sagte Humboldt.
Wieso links, fragte Bonpland.
Also rechts, sagte Humboldt.
Aber warum rechts?
Zum Teufel, rief Humboldt, jetzt werde es ihm zu blöd.

Daniel Kehlmann

Tag: humour exploration



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