Look on the bright side," said Simon, "If they need a human sacrifice, you can always offer me. I'm not sure the rest of you qualify anyway.
Cassandra ClareTag: humor optimism quip simon-lewis city-of-ashes
You're not gay, are you?"
Simon's greenish color deepened. "If I were, I would dress better.
Tag: fashion gay simon-lewis embarrasment
Pretty soon the only people left without a girlfriend will be me and Wendell the school janitor, and he smells like windex."
"At least you know he's still available.
Tag: humor dating clary-fray simon-lewis
Isabelle and Sebastian? Hardly. Sebastian’s a nice guy – Isabelle only likes dating thoroughly inappropriate boys our parents will hate. Mundanes, Downworlders, petty crooks…”
“Thanks,” Simon said. “I’m glad to be classed with the criminal element.
Tag: simon-lewis bad-boys
Simon!”
The voice was Clary’s. He would know it anywhere. He wondered if his mind was conjuring it up now, a sense memory of what he’d most loved during life to carry him through the process of death.
“Simon, you stupid idiot! I’m over here! At the window!”
Simon jumped to his feet. He doubted his mind would conjure that up.
Tag: clary-fray simon-lewis
Where's Simon?" Clary interrupted.
Isabelle wobbled. "He's a rat," she said darkly.
Did he do something to you?" Alec was full of brotherly concern. "Did he touch you? If he tried anything-"
No, Alec," Isabelle said irritably. "Not like that. He's a rat."
She's drunk," said Jace, beginning to turn away in disgust.
I'm not," Isabelle said indignantly. "Well, maybe a little, but that's not the point. The point is, Simon drank one of those blue drinks- I told him not to, but he didn't listen- and he turned into a rat.
Tag: humor transformation rat simon-lewis
Is this Clarissa Fray?" The voice on the other end of the phone sounded familiar, though not immediately identifiable.
Clary twirled the phone cord nervously around her finger. "Yeees?"
"Hi, I'm one of the knife-carrying hooligans you met last night in Pandemonium? I"m afraid I made a bad impression and was hoping you'd give me a chance to make it up to-"
"SIMON!" Clary held the phone away from her ear as he cracked up laughing. "That is so not funny!"
"Sure it is. You just don't see the humor."
"Jerk." Clary sighed, leaning up against the wall.
Tag: humor joke phone clary-fray tease simon-lewis
So--what's it like, being a vampire?"
"Aline!" Isabelle looked appalled. "You can't just go around asking people what's it like to be a vampire!"
"I don't see why," Aline said. "He hasn't been a vampire that long, has he? So he must still remember what it was like being a person." She turned back to Simon. "Does blood taste like blood to you? Or does it taste like something else now, like orange juice or something? Because I would think the taste of blood would-"
"It tastes like chicken," Simon said, just to shut her up.
"Really?" Aline looked astonished.
"He's making fun of you, Aline," said Sebastain
Tag: humor blood vampire simon-lewis
Maybe you should call him,' Simon suggested, trying not to think too hard about how weird it was to be giving a demon hunter advice about possibly dating a warlock.
Cassandra ClareTag: dating-advice simon-lewis
That's why when major badasses greet each other in movies, they don't say anything, they just nod. The nod means, 'I' am a badass, and I recognize that you, too, are a badass,' but they don't say anything because they're Wolverine and Magneto and it would mess up their vibe to explain.
Cassandra ClareTag: city-of-bones simon-lewis
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