HE BROKE HIS NOSE GIVING A FAKE BLOWJOB. Holy shit. I love that story with every part of me.
Sarah SilvermanWomen don't ask to be raped, but there are some that are asking to be motorboated
Sarah SilvermanIf women could ejaculate, I would have exploded hot jizz all over my manager's face. Instead, I hugged him. (about getting the SNL gig as a writer)
Sarah SilvermanSome people need Hell. If you’re the type of guy who sees a hooker in an alleyway and instinctively thinks, “Hey, now there’s something I could rape and kill without any consequences,” then the concept of Hell might really keep you out of trouble.
Sarah SilvermanStichwörter: hell
Great News! If you quit being cunty the whole world will stop being against you!
Sarah SilvermanStichwörter: advice satire twitter
I was paralyzed with fear. It was unbearable to be among other kids who were just standing around being fine. It was one of the many inconveniences of this paradox I lived with -the more people I was surrounded by, the more frighteningly alone I felt.
Sarah SilvermanThat still feels like the most accurate description - I felt homesick, but I was home.
Sarah SilvermanI know I'm not funny. I mean, let's face it, I'm no Groucho Marx. But if you're a guy, and you're watching late night television, are you gonna start jacking off to Groucho? I don't think so!
Sarah SilvermanStichwörter: humor
I am diagnosed with not having enough insanely-addictive drugs coursing through my body.
Sarah SilvermanStichwörter: medicine depression
Summer camp: the second worst camp for Jews.
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