What's that?" he asked, when I stood beside him again.
"Halos," I said with a grin. "For heavenly creatures like us."
"That might be a stretch.
Stichwörter: funny dimitri rose
Says O'Sullivan to me, "Mr. Fay, I'll have a word wid yeh?" "Certainly," says I; "what can I do for you?" "Sell me your sea- boots, Mr. Fay," says O'Sullivan, polite as can be. "But what will you be wantin' of them?" says I. "'Twill be a great favour," says O'Sullivan. "But it's my only pair," says I; "and you have a pair of your own," says I. "Mr. Fay, I'll be needin' me own in bad weather," says O'Sullivan. "Besides," says I, "you have no money." "I'll pay for them when we pay off in Seattle," says O'Sullivan. "I'll not do it," says I; "besides, you're not tellin' me what you'll be doin' with them." "But I will tell yeh," says O'Sullivan; "I'm wantin' to throw 'em over the side." And with that I turns to walk away, but O'Sullivan says, very polite and seducin'-like, still a-stroppin' the razor, "Mr. Fay," says he, "will you kindly step this way an' have your throat cut?" And with that I knew my life was in danger, and I have come to make report to you, sir, that the man is a violent lunatic.
Jack LondonStichwörter: humor funny sea comedy witty sailor ship
I know more damn perverts, at schools and all, than anybody you ever met, and they’re always being perverty when I’m around.
J.D. SalingerStichwörter: funny
The lot of the bride
to be wed before bed
desired until rotten.
The lot of the author
to be read before bed
admired then forgotten.
Stichwörter: humor writers humour marriage funny admiration authors desire roman weddings payne brides
Gimme an S! A T! An O! A C! Followed by a K-H-O-L-M! What's it spell? HEAD FUCK.
- Jane
Stichwörter: humor funny insane-in-the-membrane
I have to return some videotapes
Bret Easton EllisStichwörter: humor funny christian american ellis psycho return bale bret easton videotapes
As I get older, I just prefer to knit.
Tracey UllmanStichwörter: sex funny aging knitting
Arthur shook his head and sat down. He looked up.
“I thought you must be dead …” he said simply.
“So did I for a while,” said Ford, “and then I decided I was a lemon for a couple of weeks. I kept myself amused all that time jumping in and out of a gin and tonic.
Stichwörter: humor funny lemon
We already have the Wooden Pillar, the Steel Pillar and the Plastic Pillar. In a moment we will have the Golden Bail....'
No, you won't.'
We will,' stated the robot simply.
No, you won't. It makes my ship work.'
In a moment,' repeated the robot patiently, 'we will have the Golden Bail....'
You will not,' said Zaphod.
And then we must go,' said the robot, in all seriousness, 'to a party.'
Oh,' said Zaphod, startled, 'can I come?'
No,' said the robot, 'we are going to shoot you.'
Oh, yeah?' said Zaphod, waggling his gun.
Yes,' said the robot, and they shot him.
Zaphod was so surprised that they had to shoot him again before he fell down. (85-86)
Stichwörter: humor funny robot
Hey, yummy leather guy? Can you hear me? (Amanda)
Sherrilyn KenyonStichwörter: humor funny fanstastic
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