Die besten Zitate der Welt!

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.

Lily Tomlin

Stichwörter: humor apothegm complain

To say she was my girlfriend was absurd: no one the wrong side of thirty has a girlfriend… I suppose I ought to have realize it’s ominous that forty thousand years of human language had failed to produce a word for our relationship.

Robert Harris

Stichwörter: humor

The price of meat has just gone up and your old lady has just gone down.

Frank Zappa

Stichwörter: humor

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

Robert A. Heinlein

Stichwörter: humor cats women

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.

Matt Groening

Stichwörter: humor love metaphor simpsons

There's some heinous fuckery goin' on mon.

Christopher Moore

Stichwörter: humor fluke

Can't stand all these poisonous creatures, all these snakes and insects and fish and things. Wretched things, biting everybody. And then people expect me to tell them what to do about it. I'll tell them what to do. Don't get bitten in the first place. (quoting Dr. Struan Sutherland)

Douglas Adams

Stichwörter: humor inspirational

I shouldn't believe anything I say, if I were you-and that includes what I just told you.

Jasper Fforde

Stichwörter: humor truth