I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Bill Cosby

Tags: parenting-humor



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Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.

Bill Cosby


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The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.

Bill Cosby

Tags: advertising-humor



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Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.

Bill Cosby

Tags: humor-parenting



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The past is a ghost, the future a dream and all we ever have is now.

Bill Cosby

Tags: past future present time dream ghost



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A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise.

Bill Cosby

Tags: inspirational sailboat



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Nobody ever says, "Can I have your beets?

Bill Cosby

Tags: beets-humor



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And so the dentist says 'Rinse.' So you lean over, and you're lookin' at this miniature toilet bowl.

Bill Cosby

Tags: humor



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Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.

Bill Cosby


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A word to the wise ain't necessary, it's the stupid ones who need advice.

Bill Cosby

Tags: funny



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