Let my hand be a blanket for my penis.


Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


My white duvet is like an avalanche of blanket.


Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


A brick could be used as a Disappointment Cube. Here, I’m giving mine to you, because you really bummed me out, man.


Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


A blanket could be used as Concealment Revealer. It both conceals and reveals, like great dialogue. Here’s some great dialogue I wrote for two characters, Mr. Brick, and Ms. Blanket:

Mr. Brick: I like your dress

Ms. Blanket: I’m naked, you moron

Mr. Brick: Tuesdays make me vomit. What are you doing one minute after Monday at 11:59 PM?

Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


I’m the kind of guy who turns my fan on in winter, only to then go and add another blanket on top of my bed. I practice inefficiency even while I sleep, so I’ll be prepared to one day be a politician.

Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


A brick and a blanket could be used to show creativity, by making them the subjects of a divergence test. Oh wait, that’s what this is. Nevermind.


Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


A brick could be used as a pillow, if you first wrap it with a blanket. But if you’re shivering from being cold, don’t worry—I’ll cover you with my naked body.


Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


I’ve got you covered. Just don’t hog all the blanket.


Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


A blanket could be used to stop the bleeding. But what if that bleeding is figurative? In that case, I’d recommend a virtual Band-Aid.


Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


A brick could be used to ascertain the truth. And then logically, a non-brick could be used to detect the lie. What kind of things are non-bricks? Well, anything from blankets to lies. So therefore, a lie could be used to detect a lie, and all this logic makes me want to grab a blanket and lie down—and that’s the truth. 


Jarod Kintz


Go to quote


« first previous
Page 610 of 658.
next last »

©gutesprueche.com

Data privacy

Imprint
Contact
Wir benutzen Cookies

Diese Website verwendet Cookies, um Ihnen die bestmögliche Funktionalität bieten zu können.

OK Ich lehne Cookies ab