She's your mother. I asked, Plus, you do look a bit like her. When you're angry, you both get these tense lines around your mouth...Look, there they are.
Molly HarperTags: funny anger jane-jameson molly-harper mama aunt-jettie nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs
Mama operated under the assumption that I was eight years old and incapable of feeding myself. It was physically impossible for her to cross my threshold without some form of nourishment. She once offered me cheese and crackers from her while we were standing in my kitchen.
Molly HarperTags: food funny jane-jameson molly-harper mama nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs
Don't worry about being nervous. A lot of vampires have trouble with this from time to time. It happens to everyone."
"If I was a forty-year-old man suffering from erectile dysfunction, that would be a great comfort to me, thanks.
Tags: funny andrea jane-jameson molly-harper erectile-dysfunction nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs
Zeb was kindergarten teacher--a good one. I always thought it was because he was the same emotional age as his students.
Molly HarperTags: funny maturity kindergarten jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb
I fixed your car," he said, tossing the keys from a jade dish on the little maple end table.
I palmed them and eyed him speculatively. "You fixed my car?"
"I have walked the earth for more than a century. I managed to pick up some skills along the way," he said, before reluctantly adding, "and one of them is finding skilled mechanics."
I smirked, leaning against the wall. "You almost had me there."
"I supervised," he insisted.
Tags: funny gabriel jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs
You are the night."
"I am the night," I repeated.
"You are the night."
I cocked my head, sending him a questioning look. "I am the night?"
"Jane!"
"Why is it that when you say my name, it sounds like a curse word?
Tags: funny gabriel jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs
If looks could kill...well, Dick was already dead, so nothing would happen. But Gabriel was not laughing.
"See Dick," Dick said, pointing at his chest. He then swept his hand dangerously close to mind. "Jane. Dick and Jane. Come on, you humorless jackass. That's funny.
Tags: humor funny dick gabriel jane-jameson molly-harper richard nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs
I would have taken Zeb, purely for entertainment value, but he had an actual date, with a real girl. That hadn't happened in a while, so I was a good friend and put my own needs second to the possibility of him actual sex with a real girl.
Molly HarperTags: sex funny jane-jameson molly-harper nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs zeb
Jane Jameson."
He grinned. "Like the porn star."
I gaped at him. "What? No, Jane Jameson."
"Oh, not as fun," he said, making disappointed clucking noises.
Tags: funny dick jane-jameson molly-harper richard nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs porn-star
What was that?" Rich combined the pain of a crooked arm with the indignity of a flicked ear. I could only hope the situation didn't escalate to the dreaded purple nurple.
Molly HarperTags: funny dick jane-jameson molly-harper richard nice-girls-don-t-have-fangs purple-nurple
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