Yes, give us books about the psychotic behavior and peripheral weirdness we see all around every day -- and we will laugh in its face.

We are a proud people.

We are Floridians.

Tim Dorsey

Tags: florida



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Nature's what it's all about, but our people have been brainwashed into thinking that life is a cell phone against your head and the TV on a beer commercial with hot chicks.

Tim Dorsey

Tags: life nature beer tv chicks commercials cell-phones hot-chicks



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First, they set the hook with mind-bending kinky shit. Then a year later you're living in a Talking Heads song, dressed like Teddy Ruxpin, living with a strange woman in a big house full of frilly throw pillows, experiencing the frequency of sex that can only be charted by Halley's Comet. and you're wondering: How did I get here?

Tim Dorsey

Tags: men women sex marriage relationships



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Do you think heaven's like that?

Could be worse, said Serge. You know all those pushy people who keep telling us we're not going to heaven? It could be full of them instead.

Tim Dorsey

Tags: religion heaven tim-dorsey serge-storms



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A strip club is one of the few places where two groups voluntarily come together who have such precipitous contrasts in net worth and familiarity with violence, each group with a head-and-shoulders edge in one category. The basic math of a tropical storm.

Tim Dorsey

Tags: humor florida strip-club



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My problem is with the warped value system our culture has. Why is it that if you knife a woman in a movie it's PG, but if you swear at her it's rated R and if you make love to her it's rated X?

Tim Dorsey


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