A comedy that has been divide in two can never be Restored

Jun Mochizuki

Tags: comedy



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I'm not a hypochondriac, but my gynaecologist firmly believes I am.

Rodney Dangerfield

Tags: humour comedy



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Sorry, pigtails, but subtlety isn't an option anymore.

T.A. Miles

Tags: humor child comedy vampire daniel-michelson spiritualist



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I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.

Steve Martin

Tags: comedy life-and-living



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Pamela, I’m in love with you. Yeah, it’s that bad. You’re so beautiful to me. Shut up! Lemme tell you. Let me. Every time I look at your face or even remember it, it wrecks me - and the way you are with me - and you’re just fun and you shit all over me and you make fun of me and you’re real. I don’t have enough time in any day to think about you enough. I feel like I’m going to live a thousand years cause that’s how long it’s gonna take me to have one thought about you which is that I’m crazy about you, Pamela. I don’t wanna be with anybody else. I don’t. I really don’t. I don’t think about women anymore. I think about you. I had a dream the other night that you and I were on a train. We were on this train and you were holding my hand. That’s the whole dream. You were holding my hand and I felt you holding my hand. I woke up and I couldn’t believe it wasn’t real. I’m sick in love with you, Pamela. It’s like a condition. It’s like polio. I feel like I’m gonna die if I can’t be with you. And I can’t be with you. So I’m gonna die - and I don’t care cause I was brought into existence to know you and that’s enough. The idea that you would want me back it’s like greedy.

Louis C.K.

Tags: love comedy



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What is she doing here? I wondered. Hasn't she had enough green-upping?

Lisa Papademetriou

Tags: humor funny comedy comedian quirky



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Never let other people bring you down let Jesus be the one who brings you down, because he knows what he is doing

Skye Daphne

Tags: humor romance science-fiction comedy insperational-story



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Women are aroused by the strangest things, like a rock going through their bedroom window

Josh Stern

Tags: comedy absurd-humor-women-aroused



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Detective Inspector Eccles sighed. He may ordinarily have met his sigh with the question of why the newly appointed Superintendent Dickinson was turning up to this late hour crime scene, he may also ordinarily question why his superior officer was dressed as Julius Caesar, in full tunic and green leafy wreath, yet ever since the new and youngest-ever-appointed superintendent had arrived at the Met it had been all too clear he was an officer who didn’t quite do things by the eBook.

Tom Conrad

Tags: murder humour comedy detectives pomposity ebooks crime-scenes



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Meaning, yes -- I don't really exist except on the page or in the back of your brain. But if you think it's weird a fictional character's telling this story, you ain't seen what happened, yet.

Kyle Michel Sullivan

Tags: humor comedy mystery suspense thriller farce



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